Last fall was difficult like any other winter has been thus far. The first fall in '21 was intimidating in terms of leaving the house and the country both at the same time for the very first time. This one was different though. This time I was confident in the day-to-day part and now the only challenge was science at the centre. Building a meaningful career remained the only missing piece of the puzzle.
After working in the lab with American batch mates throughout the year of '22, this was my first individual research project, which began in the fall. Building an antenna — a radio frequency antenna — for a particular transition in the trapped lithium atoms, specifically for state selective imaging using the dipolar radiation of that magnetic loop antenna! That's very fancy jargon in the last statement, completely unnecessary "scientific language", sorry for that! But in short, it was an electrical engineer's project, and since my training was solely based on physics, of course, I struggled a lot. Literally, to the point that I had a conversation with my PI on whether I should switch groups. To which he said, "I think you can do it, but I can help you find an easier lab if you are struggling with handling a variety of projects in the current lab!" That was quite a phase, but thankfully we somehow stayed put with it and I had one successful prototype by December ready to go!
I started fresh this year, at the dawn of spring 2023! The spring started with a pleasant surprise — a winter school experience. Me and my senior labmate David went to this winter school in Arizona, learned from the best researchers in the world over a highly engaging week in that deserted state! It was beautiful though — while the Indian foodie inside me suffered a lot with American food on my plate every day, the curious scientist breathed fresh air into those mountains. With a beautiful view and celebrated physicists around us, it gave me enough belief that since we have reached here and have got an opportunity of this interaction, we cannot be called "unsuccessful" — and if you keep believing, this journey will head towards a bright destination soon. It's all about getting that approach man — once you have it, the rest starts falling in place.
First lab publication!
When we got back from that conference/school, we all were focused on getting the first result for the lab. Through the professor's vision and our collective perseverance, finally we got it! We had trapped and cooled down a single Lithium atom to very cold temperatures starting from a cloud of hot atoms — for the very first time ever, also with the best imaging accuracy in the world! That ought to feel good, eh? We were delighted, started scripting together a paper, and submitted one by the end of spring. First lab publication! Very satisfying!
After that each student in the lab sort of got their own projects and we are working now in an "Americanised" way, each going for his own "American dream"! Boring research but should make it sound fancy to stay motivated so!
Also, the best thing about having American labmates, from different parts of the state, is that you get to know exactly how they shape their lives, and you appreciate the cultural differences when comparing your upbringing. For example, my undergrad education was completed for almost 1000$ in total, and my grad was around 500$ at max! When I told this to my labmates, who took loans for their education which took more than 100K$, one of them told me jokingly that "After listening to this, I almost want to hit you right now, lucky guy!". This is what I meant when I said we appreciate only after realising the differences around us!
Teaching Mumbai students
In the summer, I have also started a new thing on the weekends — I teach a summer course, on atomic physics, for students doing masters at Mumbai University. For a long time, I was thinking in terms of contributing somehow to people's lives or guiding others who have a similar journey and learning from their experiences while sharing your little pieces! Why not donate money? Well, the only considerable income a PhD student has is "knowledge", and by god's grace, we are below poverty line in other resources!! So, while living a "rich life" what we can give away best is I think our time and patience to the next batch of students. There is a lot of learning and many people now have told me that the best form of learning happens when you teach something. Experiencing that is changing my life and slowly making me realise that this can be a life goal in my career. Let's see, you never know!
So, these days this is what my routine looks like: the day starts early, as the sun is always competing with you in the summer to challenge you that he will wake up before you. After the basic morning routine, there is a beautiful bike ride to look forward to which takes me to the lab for research. Even though the temperatures sometimes get hot in the summer, with ample Asian "brown" skin on me, it feels like a pleasant day! That's an advantage of living in a small town, that you can sort of "hear" nature and spend time with it while keeping the "concrete" buildings and beliefs away for some time. Also, people wave back and smile while crossing you on the road when you are on a bike, the cars respect you and your mood is set in the morning itself! Who needs a car if you have such a ride?
Philosophically, I find it funny that the lab is "downhill" from where my house is — sometimes life also follows that as research gets tough, but other days it's fine, chill don't worry!
On relationships and our generation
Approaching 27, now I hear a lot of stories around me of marriages and togetherness, both successful and sad. There are couples happily living in the US, there are who are returning, and some making long distance work. Our generation faces a very different kind of challenge, in which now the balance is more between career goals and family values than money and family time. As we are growing and becoming significant individuals, the power of sacrifice and patience is getting immensely embedded in future decisions. The approach of slowly shaping life together now, is more than the traditional construction of a sustainable future.
The mentality that I am in right now is making the best out of everyday experience. I love writing, hence having this dialogue with you! Love teaching, hence sharing with the students every Saturday. Love research, hence going for this "highly paid" educational PhD project! While doing that I also want to maintain the small things — contact with my people, connect with society, a growth of my "self" as a person beyond what my childhood self-imagined "you" would be!
How can I stay active while still feeling useful to society — this question I think bothers us always, and the only way to answer that in my opinion is to stay available for people around you and influence their lives in a good way. That impact, I think, will keep us motivated to keep doing the silly tasks we call "work" every day and going after those stupid pieces of paper we call "money" — just so that we can in our spare time do certain things that make us feel alive! We all try, and we will keep trying! See you again in the next article, in this never-ending journey of meaningful yet unnecessary conversations!